Welcome to the confessional, Bookworms. I wanted to write about the “cheesiest” book I’d ever read, because I’m overly literal and wanted to capitalize on my use of the term “word nachos.” I’ve read more Harlequin romance novels than I care to admit. I’m going to go ahead and lump them all into the same pile ‘o cheese because really- who can differentiate?
I place the blame for this habit squarely on the shoulders of my college roommate and butter-churning-best-friend-from-a-past-life Chrissy. I distinctly remember Chrissy distracting me from studying for something or other by tossing me a cheap paperback with a picture of a redhead lounging in a bubble bath on the cover.
The covers alone are hysterical:
Yes, I actually read this one.
Over the years, Harlquins evolved to accommodate a wide range of interests- they truly have something for everyone. You like your romance rated PG? They’ve got your wholesome wait-until-the-wedding-night set. You have a thing for cowboys? Greek tycoons? Middle Eastern princes? Check, check, and check. You can count on Harlequin for two things. The first is you’re guaranteed a couple of steamy scenes (I’ve never read one that went full 50 Shades, but they vary in intensity.) Second, you can expect epic and relentless CHEESE. I’m talking full on word nacho liquid cheesy goodness. They’re so bad they’re good.
You thought I was kidding about the Sheikhs, didn’t you?
So, what can you expect as far as plot lines? Boy meets girl. Boy and girl are undeniably and impossibly attracted to each other. Boy and girl must overcome seemingly insurmountable obstacles in order to be together forever. (I read one where this guy didn’t want to get into a relationship because his doctor had told him he might have an unnamed incurable blood disorder. This was his reasoning for holding his soul mate at arm’s length. I didn’t say the scenarios were realistic.) The boy and/or girl each keep the truth of their baggage a secret and inadvertently break each other’s hearts… and their own. Of course, they eventually figure things out. And they ALWAYS live happily ever after.
They usually end with an engagement, a wedding, or a baby.
Harlequin romance novels and their ilk are literary junk food. Small doses are just fine, but reading romance novels exclusively will probably rot your brain. But you work hard! Give yourself a break from reality and indulge. You might even pick up a creative new vocabulary word! Bookworm tip- there are a number of trashy Harlequin romance novels available on the Kindle for FREE.
Anybody out there care to admit their guilty literary pleasures? Anyone? Anyone? Bueller?
ashley
I’ve never read a Harlequin Romance novel! *gasp* lol. But I must admit my guilty literary pleasure are all those cheesy chick lit books. I can’t help but cheer for the girl who finds the guy of her dreams and tries to win him over and finds her true self in the process all Bridget Jones style. (One of my favorite books by the way)
wordsforworms
Bridget Jones is possibly one of my favorite literary characters in the history of ever. In college my friend and I named all our house plants after Bridget characters… Get yourself a Harlequin. It’ll be good for you. You’ll laugh! Handcuffed to the Shiekh, yo. I mean, come on!
ashley
I’m definitely going to download a free Harlequin!
Quirky Chrissy
You’re welcome.
wordsforworms
You’re probably the reason I got a B in Psychology. Just so you know. You and Harlequin.
Quirky Chrissy
Man, I got a C in Psychology. It was a boring class. Much like Geology. The only other class I got a C in–you know the one I blame for not being cum laude.
Ashley
I will totally admit to a love of sappy historical romance novels. As for true guilty pleasures, I spent the summer I turned 13 staying with my Grandmother after my Grandfather died. Because she went to bed so early and I didn’t want to keep her awake with noise from the TV I would read and all she had was old hollywood biographies, 1980s Harlequins and old Barbara Cartland romance novels. I read dozens and dozens of those things that summer.
Words for Worms
Thanks for visiting! Your Grandma had fun taste in books! All my Grandma had around was Reader’s Digest…
Ashley
I found your blog from Chrissy! We follow eachother’s blogs. I’m a pretty massive book nerd so love your blog.
Words for Worms
Thank you! Chrissy is the best, isn’t she?
Claire PG
Ah! You’ve exposed my guilty pleasure – those dang Harlequin Romance Novels. Every time I get done with one I do the “ho-hum, same old same old” and pick a new one up. Such a vicious cycle! But, they are the perfect summer read for lounging in the sun – spill your drink on ’em … no biggy! I may have modge-podged a coffee table of all the book covers last fall … not gonna lie, it’s pretty impressive … and hilarious … !
Thanks for sharing!
Words for Worms
You mod-podged a coffee table of Harlequin covers?! That might be the most awesome thing I’ve ever heard. Thanks for visiting 🙂
ThatAshGirl
Chrissy is awesome. I would have had so much more fun in University if I had known her.
Tilly Bud - The Laughing Housewife
I love these kinds of books. There’s nothing wrong with reading fluff, so long as you know it’s fluff. And they are difficult to write – I know; I tried.
When I was 8 1/2 months pregnant with my first child, I read seven Mills & Boons (British equivalent to Harlequin) in one day. My hormones demanded it.
Words for Worms
Hahhahahaha! That’s the best thing I’ve ever heard. Awesome. I’m glad you appeased your hormones!